Telling Their Story
When Margaret Thompson's family sat down to write her obituary last spring, they faced a familiar challenge: how do you capture 87 years of laughter, love, and apple pies in just a few paragraphs?
"Mom was so much more than dates and facts," her daughter Sarah recalls. "She was the woman who taught half the neighbourhood kids to ride bikes, who never met a stray cat she wouldn't feed, and who could make anyone feel welcome at her kitchen table."
That's the heart of a meaningful obituary – it's not just an announcement, it's a story. The best obituaries don't just tell us when someone died; they help us understand how they lived.
Start with What Made Them Smile
Instead of beginning with the standard format, consider opening with what brought your loved one joy. Did Dad light up when talking about his vegetable garden? Did Mom's eyes sparkle when her grandchildren visited? These details paint a picture that friends and neighbours will recognize and remember.
Let Their Voice Shine Through
Every person has phrases they used, causes they championed, or quirks that made them uniquely themselves. Maybe it was Grandpa's terrible dad jokes, or Aunt Helen's insistence that "there's no such thing as strangers, only friends you haven't met yet." These personal touches transform a formal notice into a celebration of character.
Include the Everyday Magic
The most touching obituaries often mention the small things: the way someone hummed while cooking, their dedication to the morning crossword puzzle, or how they never forgot a birthday. These details might seem insignificant, but they're often what people remember most fondly.
Make It a Community Story
Great obituaries connect the person to their community. Did they coach little league for twenty years? Volunteer at the food bank? Help organize the annual church bazaar? These connections remind us that every life touches many others in meaningful ways.
Don't Forget the Fun
It's okay to include gentle humour or mention endearing quirks. If Uncle Bob was notorious for his loud Hawaiian shirts or Grandma was famous for her competitive streak at family game night, these details bring warmth to the tribute.
Writing an obituary is really about answering one simple question: What would you want people to remember about this person's time on earth? When you focus on the love they shared, the joy they brought, and the lives they touched, you create more than an announcement – you create a lasting celebration of a life well-lived.
After all, the best stories are the ones that make us smile through our tears.
Essential Questions to Ask:
Basic Information
- What was their full name (including maiden name, nicknames)?
- When and where were they born?
- When and where did they pass away?
- What was the cause of death (if family wishes to share)?
Life Story
- Where did they grow up and go to school?
- What was their career or profession?
- What were their major life achievements?
- What hobbies, interests, or passions defined them?
- What organizations, clubs, or causes were they involved with?
Family Connections
- Who were their parents?
- Were they married? To whom and for how long?
- Do they have children? Grandchildren? Great-grandchildren?
- Who are their surviving siblings?
- Who predeceased them?
Personal Character
- What words best describe their personality?
- What will people remember most about them?
- What were their favorite sayings or expressions?
- What brought them joy?
- How did they impact others' lives?
Community Involvement
- What local organizations did they support?
- Did they volunteer anywhere?
- Were they involved in church or community groups?
- Did they have a military service record?
Service Information
- When and where is the visitation/viewing?
- When and where is the funeral or memorial service?
- Where will burial/interment take place?
- Who is officiating the service?
Memorial Preferences
- Are flowers welcome, or do they prefer donations?
- Which charities or causes would they want supported?
- Are there specific memorial fund instructions?
Writing Tips:
Structure Suggestions
- Opening: Full name, age, date, and place of death
- Life Summary: Birth, education, career, achievements
- Personal Qualities: Character traits, interests, passions
- Family: Survivors and those who predeceased
- Service Details: Times, dates, locations
- Memorial Information: Flowers, donations, special requests
Tone Guidelines
- Celebrate their life rather than focus solely on loss
- Use specific examples that show their character
- Include meaningful details that friends will recognize
- Keep it personal but appropriate for public reading
- Proofread carefully - this is a permanent tribute
Sample Opening Lines
- "John Smith, beloved husband and father, passed away peacefully..."
- "Mary Johnson, longtime Wellington County resident and community volunteer..."
- "It is with heavy hearts that we announce the passing of..."
Common Phrases to Consider
- "Surrounded by family"
- "After a courageous battle with..."
- "Passed away peacefully"
- "Will be deeply missed by..."
- "In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to..."
Final Reminders:
- Take your time - this is an important tribute
- Ask family members to contribute memories and details
- Review funeral home information for accuracy
- Consider hiring a professional if writing feels overwhelming
- Our staff is here to help with editing and formatting
Contact our office if you need assistance or have questions about submitting your family notice.